i would be more emotionally at peace with this colonoscopy prep if i weren’t such an avid boardwalk empire watcher

nonomella:

here are some excerpts from my thanksgiving lesson. once class just couldn’t let the whole squanto thing go. it was not a particularly productive lesson.

(via chrisreblogs)

davereed:

lazygolddigger:

kris jenner is such a bitch

unbelievable

How did reddit not find this person

davereed:

lazygolddigger:

kris jenner is such a bitch

unbelievable

How did reddit not find this person

”As the ‘Scrooged’ production was beginning,” recalls Mitch Glazer, ”Billy asked O’Donoghue and me to go with him to this Mexican desert resort for a little male bonding. We did a lot of swimming and hiking, and Billy was really sweet to all the other guests, who loved meeting him. Unfortunately, there was this one Beverly Hills woman, a Rodeo Drive type who wore furs in the blazing sun, and she insisted on treating Billy like he was some ornament to her vacation.

”On her last day, she was pressing him for autographs and things, and Billy always complied. Finally, she cornered him for yet another autograph and he calmly said, ‘O.K., but I’ll have to have something in return. I get to throw you in the pool.’ She laughed, saying, ‘Sure, you do that,’ as he signed - and then he went for it, escorting her toward the deep end of the pool. She dropped to the deck, gaping, but Billy reminded her that a bargain was a bargain, and he slipped his hands under her, rolling her - furs and all - into the water.”

Tags: bill murray

goodbyemisery:

i went into a whole foods and got to hear a woman arguing with a guy at the meat counter because she wanted grass fed organic chicken and he was desperately trying to explain to her that chickens don’t eat grass

(via thegeorgiasoul)

CALLING ALL KNOPES

The Upworthy Generator

wondertonic:

image

The Upworthy Generator randomly creates an Upworthy-style article with the click of a button.

just too good

(via bestrooftalkever)

Tags: upworthy

humorous-blog:

pizzaforpresident:

I SCROLLED DOWN SO SLOWLY WATCHING ALL THE GIFS VERY CLOSELY AND I REALLY WASN’T EXPECTING THAT I CAN’T FUCKING BREATHE OMFG

(Source: awkward-elevator, via jesse9000)

happy veterans day

why, hello best vanity plate in the commonwealth of pennsylvania

why, hello best vanity plate in the commonwealth of pennsylvania