February 2011
95 posts
LITTLE BIG PLANET 2
how many of my internet friends are playing this whimsical gem?
January 2011
97 posts
Diddy Sued for $1 Trillion, Blamed for 9/11 →
billboard.com
A woman has filed a $1 trillion lawsuit against Diddy (real name: Sean Combs), alleging that he caused 9/11, put her child in the hospital and stole a poker chip worth “100 zillions of dollars.”
Valerie Joyce Wilson Turks is seeking a restraining order against the mogul, which a judge denied, but set a hearing for Jan. 31.
Turks believes Diddy, his ex-girlfriend Kim Porter (the mother of their twins) and LAPD brutality victim Rodney King were behind the collapse of the World Trade Center towers, according to court papers obtained by RadarOnline.com.
“[Diddy] went through Kim Porter and Rodney King and knocked down the WTC and then they all came and knocked my children down. Set me up to be on disability and disabled my baby. he put my baby in a wheelchair,” Turks writes in her papers.
Turks claims she once dated Diddy, and they have a son together, Cornelius Wilson, 23.
She also says: “”Plus I won a lot of money at the casino in Mississippi and Sean P. Diddy Combs has my chip to my money. I heard he gave it to Gwen Allen to hold but she can not cash it in. I want my chip please help me. it’s well worth over 100 zillions of dollars, and my hospital keys. They put me and my baby in the hospital and broke my baby 2 legs and sexual assaulted my children and crushed us.”
this story is sad if you really think about it, so try not to
A description of any shot taken during the NHL breakaway challenge
“oh that would have been nice if he pulled it off”
PHIL KESSEL
wipe that goofy smile off your face. last pick, son.
going to chicago
2/27 - 3/5
meh
how I DVR things
Step 1: Don’t pay for your own DVR.
Step 2: Call your brother, who lives with our parents to use their DVR.
Step 3: If your brother is not at home, call your mom.
Step 4: Have mom wake up dad, because mom does not understand DVR.
Step 5: Wait 3 minutes while dad figures out how to use speakerphone on mom’s cell phone, because real men don’t hold phones to their ears.
Step 6: Listen to dad talk himself through the longest way possible to DVR something.
Step 7: Polite conversation about Steelers.
DONE.
is perfect couples cancelled yet?
there’s way too much time in between the funny stuff the waitress says, but those times aren’t long enough to take naps in
i am the smartest person in this focus group
“you could write until the internet is full and this amendment would still be unclear”
i should be a lawmaker
“this bill doesn’t define its terms, and that’s basically because nobody knows what ‘when the life of the mother is in danger means’. you could write until the internet is full, and it still wouldn’t be clear.”
- moderator: raymond, who has the right to an abortion
- raymond: anyone who can pay for one
- moderator: um, does anyone disagree?
- 8 people at once: AJHDLKDHIHEUFLIULFISHDFLISUEHWHFICATSFHSDHF
who the hell put this focus group together? put 10 pro choice people in a room and guess what they’re gonna say? this is ridiculous boring AND I STILL HAVE ANOTHER HOUR
